9 Things I Took for Granted Before Chronic Illness

I didn’t realize how much I’d miss such simple aspects of life when I was healthy. Hopefully, this list can serve as a reminder that it’s the little things to be grateful for and the small victories to cherish.

A chronic illness diagnosis can rearrange nearly every facet of a person’s life. In my case, symptoms began immediately after college, forcing me to reimagine my future version of success before ever finding stability in young adulthood.

These are the nine facets of my healthy life that I took for granted before chronic illness.

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1. Mobility

The ability to move our bodies functionally often goes without thanks, but having predictable physical capabilities is largely what allows us to lead productive and fulfilling lives.

I miss being able to stand in the HomeGoods line for an absurd 30 minutes, knowing I can independently hang up my new seasonal decor as soon as I’m home. I never imagined such unimpressive, everyday tasks would suddenly become physically inaccessible at a young age.

Mobility is a top-notch human feature that all too often gets overlooked and underappreciated when we still have it.

2. Feeling ‘at home’

Ever notice that feeling of comfort and relief when you return home after a long day? There’s a lot to be said for feeling truly at ease with our surroundings and being able to unmask at home. Safety is a fundamental human need, but it’s often elusive for anyone with chronic conditions because we’re dealing with unanswered questions, incurable illnesses, and frayed trust.

For some of us, we aren’t secure in our bodies, perhaps feel shame for struggling, and often aren’t around people who prioritize our complex health needs — even at home.

Whether feeling foreign in my physical body or unsettled in living environments, “at home” is a kind of internal peace I haven’t experienced since the onset of my chronic condition.

3. Maintaining friendships

Sure, many folks struggle to find quality friends in adulthood. But personally, I never lamented the task of staying connected when I was healthy. I did it without thought. Chronic patients can lose friends for tons of reasons: low energy, shifting priorities, financial strain, or pals tired of waiting for us to “get better.”

Sometimes, the very best friends become ultimately unhealthy if they’re unable to cope with our fluctuating health. It’s hard to find friends who respect limitations, and it’s hard to keep friends without any promise of eventual recovery.

Regardless, losing friends hurts. I’ve found it particularly painful to realize I can’t offer the support friends need or deserve. I’ve lost several friendships simply because I don’t have the energy to devote to maintaining them.

4. Energy as a renewable personal resource

When healthy, you trust that your body will recharge as you sleep. In my case, with a neurologically-based sleep disorder and an autoimmune illness, sleep is no longer restorative. As a result, I have to budget my limited energy in ways healthy people don’t.

Choosing to “do it all” isn’t just a recipe for energy crashes and sniffles. It’s a real threat to my long-term health since I can’t replenish my energy effectively.

5. Pain-free days

People with chronic conditions get pretty good at hiding pain. When you manage some discomfort daily, your baseline tolerance changes. My “normal” used to be pain-free.

These days, “normal” is level 3 or 4 discomfort on the smiley-face pain chart. It fluctuates depending on the day but never fully fades. As dramatic as it sounds, I forget what it feels like to have a pain-free day.

6. Traveling with ease

I often slept at friends’ apartments without hesitation, using my hoodie as a makeshift pillow on a futon. Chronic illness dissolved my carefree, go-with-the-flow spontaneity. In a flare-up, I can’t carry my overnight bag or walk four blocks to the train in a flare-up. Self-injection days are nonnegotiable.

There are many “just in case” items to bring, minimal flexibility, and a high injury risk, and packing depletes me before even leaving home. With worries about proper medication, ergonomic pillows, unexpected allergies, unreliable joints, and temperature dysregulation, overnight travel became more of a hassle than it’s worth for either party.

7. Budget control

Being chronically ill can significantly reduce opportunities for wealth-building and career ascension. The scope of financial possibility narrows because spoonies don’t have the luxury of free time or excess energy the way others do. While our healthy peers might spend evenings on a side hustle or networking, we’re driving to new doctors and fighting insurance.

This isn’t to say economic stability is out of reach … it just means we need to be more resourceful to make ends meet with our unique saving hurdles. Losing the simplicity of a nine-to-five job and predictable expenses is something I still struggle with.

8. The ability to plan

It’s hard to build a 5-year plan when our health is actively declining or in limbo. Likewise, dreaming big can be futile when medication access, surgery outcomes, financial security, and care coverage are largely beyond our control. Having the ability to set concrete goals with timelines is a freedom that often seems unrealistic.

Not to mention, it’s discouraging to set intentions only to watch flare-ups dismantle our progress or shift our targets repeatedly. When we can’t rely on our health, it’s tempting to set dreams aside and stop planning altogether. I wish I appreciated the ability to set and achieve goals before chronic conditions took the steering wheel.

9. Balance

The concept of a balanced life is rarely accessible to those who aren’t traditionally able-bodied. While I care deeply about my health, most wellness advice is overgeneralized and irrelevant for chronic condition patients.

In a week with four appointments, my energy must be focused there, even if it means skipping exercise. If I don’t have the energy to grocery shop, I’m better off ordering pizza than eating nothing, despite how hard I’m trying to limit takeout.

Chronic conditions force us to choose between competing health priorities. Plus, a balanced life stems from a normative concept of time. I’m often living in the future (anticipating medical needs), reliving the past (managing health repercussions), or waiting for things beyond my control. I can’t just exist in the present, hoping I won’t need my meds refilled next Friday.

The hours aren’t all mine to carve out anymore. I wish I realized the luxury of time freedom before my planner was crammed with tests and treatment.

Takeaway

I don’t share my reflections from a high horse (my joints certainly wouldn’t allow it) but rather as someone who admittedly took these things for granted until recently.

Likewise, I won’t shame myself for inadvertently glazing over these blessings. Hindsight and internalized ableism are 20/20. As my chronic illnesses took center stage, these nine facets of a healthy life became illuminated. I realized their value largely in their absence and wish I had treasured them sooner.

I hope these reminders encourage you to celebrate, document, and cherish your most mundane moments. They form the fabric of everyday existence and likely keep you cozier than you realize.